Conversology & Positive Psychology

By Dr Charles Margerison.

How do people develop happiness in their lives?

How do you build on your strengths and make the most of your abilities?

How do you develop resilience to confront difficult challenges in your life?

These are all questions that are central to the research and applications in the new science of Positive Psychology. It is an area of psychology that is important for everyone, especially teachers and students. Rather than focusing on the negatives, it is important to focus on the positives and how to achieve them. In effect, rather than becoming depressed with what goes wrong, we can put energy into improving our situation.

Inspiration From Amazing People

In my work, studying the lives of over 500 amazing people, I have been fascinated by the way they focussed on their opportunities as the basis for success. Mozart identified his special music talent and developed it. Marie Curie recognised her interest in and aptitude for Science and became the only woman to have won two Nobel Prizes for different areas. Shakespeare built on his story writing talents, rather than try to be an engineer. In contrast, Eiffel developed his special talent to construct towers and other buildings.

More recently, I have focussed on how creative stories can help pre-school children develop their language skills and gain confidence in communicating with others. I have developed a set of characters where four children meet on their adventure tours to a place called Imagineland.

All these stories help children to discuss important issues.  In the Amazing People series for primary and secondary students, people like Florence Nightingale exemplify caring for and helping others.  Harriet Tubman, a slave who escaped, exemplifies both bravery and the determination to fight for equal rights, despite the fact that she didn’t have any formal education.  Dr Barnardo, a medical doctor who saw homeless children in the streets of London, showed practical compassion by organising homes where they could be protected and educated.

Character Values

These amazing life stories provide an excellent basis for discussion on key character values.  It also gives an indication to children, of how important it is to have a purpose in life.  Their conversation skills improve when they have something specific to talk about.  They can then relate these to specifics such as courage, persistence, confidence and converse on how those will apply to their own lives.

Early Learners

In the Imagineland series for younger students, they can relate to important points of conversation, albeit at a different level due to their language abilities.  We have found that the story of Deedely Dee, a duck that the children encounter while she is out working looking for food to feed her family, is an excellent way of having children understand the importance of work.  Likewise, we have developed other stories which enable them to talk about sharing and caring.

Conversation Skills

Learning conversation skills goes beyond an understanding of grammar.  It requires students to have the ability to converse about concepts and ideas, and turn them into examples and illustrations.  The stories of both real people, and fictional characters help in the development of concepts and ideas.  In the process, students improve their conversation skills and can express themselves both in rational logical terms, as well as emotional feeling terms of what they are thinking.

Learning How To Converse

It is this balance between emotion and reason that is so important in Conversology.  In the main, we learn how emotional conversation skills start long before we enter school.  Our interaction with parents, family and friends involves considerable discussion on likes and dislikes.  Our parents will often tell us that we cannot do certain things.  Children will often protest and try to use their conversation skills to change the decision.  That is what I call Conversology in action, as Conversology is learning how to converse.

Before we go to school, we are taught that reasoning in the form of providing evidence for our arguments and wishes, is important.  However, it is noticeable that excuses are often presented as a form of reason when students don’t want to do something, which the teacher may think is important.  An example is – ‘I could not do my homework because a dog ate my book’.

What Is Conversology

In short, Conversology is something that we learn every day without formally studying it. It is observed as part of our interaction with friends, family and teachers.

Conversology is a form of self-development.  We are reflecting on the conversations to discover ways in which we can influence and be influenced.

For some people, Conversology is learning how to gather and assess the facts.

For others, Conversology starts with what one believes.  It is interesting to listen to conversations, where you have people with different perspectives.  Those who follow the facts will only draw conclusions when they feel they know what they are talking about.  People who follow their emotions will speak convincingly, and adopt facts as required to support their views.

Conversology therefore is something students can learn.  It will help them through their lives in negotiations.  It will help them socially by enjoying informal discussions. Most of all, it will help them in using their knowledge in work situations.  Conversology, is the most important area of the curriculum.  Sadly, little formal attention is paid to it, as it is assumed it is a natural skill.  For some people who reflect on their conversations that may be the case. but for others, it is a subject that needs to be taught through practical examples and exercises rather than just as a theory.